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Seven Tips For Drawing Your Date Into a Conversation

There's a great scene in Monty Python's 'The Meaning of Life' where a couple go to a restaurant that serves not food, but conversations. They order one and get a set of cue-cards, which start them off, but soon they go off into their own territory. Oh, if it were only that easy! Well, we're going to try to do the same thing.

Here is a list of ideas to get the flow of talk going between you and your date, whether in person or online.

#1. Ask about work.

Just about everybody works, and anybody with a full-time job spends about one-third of their lives doing it. So a lot is going on, there. Asking your date about their work is the perfect opportunity for them to vent about co-workers they don't get along with, or enthuse about the things they like about their career choice, and so on. In addition, you're bound to encounter some odd facts you didn't know. Every job, no matter how boring it sounds, has something interesting about it that only the people who work there know about.

#2. Tell a story about your pets.

Either that, or ask about your date's pets. Two partners who each have a cat will automatically fill the next two hours with their top five funny cat moments. And people who have owned various pets throughout their lives never run out of stories.

#3. Trade funny experiences.

Everybody has a flat tire story, or a bicycle accident story, or the one about the time a bat got in the house. Whatever it is, if it's not too unusual, chances are your date will have another one to share after that. It's fun, gets you laughing, and it inspires a sense of camaraderie.

#4. Talk about dreams.

At first, this seems to be getting 'too close, too soon'. The land of our inner mind in the realm of the subconscious which we visit only in slumber seems too private, too deep. But actually, there are people who feel at ease talking about their dreams, particularly if something funny happened. Of course, anybody hearing the story will jump on the chance to psychoanalyze you. Take it lightly and treat it like a game; entertain the silliest ideas. It's easy and fun, and inspires intimacy.

#5. Ask about fantasies.

Now we're talking intimate! One way to kindle a sexual spark is to ask what fantasies your date has so far not fulfilled, but would like to. Everybody has heard of one kink they'd like to try, or a setting that sounds fun, or an experience where they tried a romantic bubble bath and it all went wrong when they hopped in and the tub overflowed or they got a ticket for trying to have sex on the beach.

#6. Share a news story.

Back in 'first date' territory, the Internet and the omnipresence of mobile devices gives us the perfect set-up for discussing current events. Mention a story that you know impacts the other person. If you know they support a political party, mention the last story you heard about how the candidate from that party is doing. Or if you know what company they work for, you can mention the last news story you read about that industry. This being the 21st century, it's almost impossible to not find news on some subject, no matter how much of a niche it's in.

#7. Describe a movie you've seen or book you've read.

This can be either a recommendation or a critical review. Saying what you like or didn't like about it tells a little bit about your tastes and preferences. It's also your chance to show how well you can summarize a plot or describe a character. This works best with fans of a certain genre of fiction; some of the most fun time you ever spent in company is when somebody describes The Rocky Horror Picture Show to you if you've never heard of it before!
 

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